Duct Tape Parenting

Tuesday, September 6, 2016
Vicki Hoefle
Duct Tape Parenting

A Less is More Approach to Raising Respectful, Responsible, and Resilient Kids


This book has passed through my hands a couple of times, and even though my children are now young adults, I felt compelled to read it. It helped me to recognize my own parenting hang-ups like micromanaging, doing it myself so it's done "right", and bailing them out instead of letting them make their own mistakes and deal with the natural consequences. This is how you raise children who don't feel entitled to everything. I love the commonsense approach.

The focus of this book is to stop helicopter parenting, and to encourage parents to take a step back and allow children to learn from life lessons. Vicki Hoefle states that, "Duct Tape Parenting is a hands-off approach to parenting with a focus on developing and deepening the relationship between parents and kids without anyone feeling like a doormat or a dictator." She believes that the behaviors which get the most attention will continue to grow, whereas the behaviors that are ignored will fade away. Childhood is for learning and, through practice, kids learn skills for the real world. They also develop a sense of worth and self-confidence when their parents don’t cater to their every move.

There’s a new set of 3Rs for our kids—respect, responsibility, and resilience—to better prepare them for life in the real world. Once developed, these skills let kids take charge and let parents step back, to the benefit of all. Casting hover mothers and helicopter parents aside, Vicki Hoefle encourages a different, counterintuitive—yet much more effective—approach: for parents to sit on their hands, stay on the sidelines, even if duct tape is required, so that the kids step up. Duct Tape Parenting gives parents a new perspective on what it means to be effective, engaged parents and to enable kids to develop confidence through solving their own problems. This is not a book about the parenting strategy of the day—what the author calls "Post-It Note Parenting"—but rather a relationship-based guide to span all ages and stages of development. Witty, straight-shooting Hoefle addresses frustrated parents everywhere who are ready to raise confident, capable children to go out in the world.

Check our catalog for this book.


Marybeth K., Circulation

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